JAN'S TALES
The One Thing
A very dear
friend of mine, Mrs. Reynolds, (yes, the one that owns the
Husband Road
property.) has a mother who has Alzheimer disease. Her mothers name is Rachel
and she has had this disease for close to 8 years now. Rachel’s mind has been
slowly going backwards for some time now and at the present is in a child-like
state that is comparative to a 6 or 7 year old. She has forgotten all her
friends, church members, extended family, and the past 50 to 60 years of her
life. Mrs. Reynolds and her family live with Rachel as they are taken care of
her instead of admitting her to a home for the elderly. Even with the immediate
family around her she does good to remember their names as well as who they are
and everyday is a struggle to comprehend and perform simple tasks we all take
for granted. I’m sure those of you out there whom have had or do have relatives
with this type of disease know what this family is going through and can
sympathize and relate.
There are people, even family members that only see Rachel maybe a few times a
month and each time she has to be re-introduced to them and even then she often
does not recall who they are. But, it remains a mystery as to how she always
remembers me when I come to visit. She remembers my name, where I live, and she
shows an undying and gentle love towards me when we are together. She’ll take me
aside, arm in arm, and tell me about her dreams and how God talks to her while
she sleeps. At times she goes into great detail about the relatives she also
speaks with while unconscious, those whom have passed on years ago.
For several
years she has gotten frustrated with one thing she has been meaning to tell me but
just can’t remember. She’ll apologize and start crying at these moments, but I
assure her that God will let her remember when the time is right and not to
worry over it. Each time we have met over the past few years this ‘one thing’
keeps nagging at her and we have to work through it together to ease her
anguish, but our visits together are always charmingly adolescent in
conversation and attitude. (It humbles you when you have to drop your guard
down, lose your adulthood for a bit and become a child again with another. It’s
a wonderfully stress relieving activity to transform your mind and thoughts to
being and acting like an innocent youngster again.)
There were no worries, no
pains, no pressing appointments that couldn’t wait until later, and it was at
those times with Rachel that will always be cherished, because the feelings of
‘innocence lost’ replaced the ‘adult responsibilities’ and it let me be a kid
again. I want to add here in this story that there have been a few photos of
Rachel and I taken together and that there were always several large orbs all
around us as well as countless smaller ones radiating outward appearing in the
pictures. When looking at these, Rachel quietly says, ‘See, there are the
angels.’ She has also taken to calling me one of her little angels, and
continues to this day to greet me with open arms, smiles and hugs and calls me
by name. And for special occasions, like birthdays and Christmas she insists she
buy me something with an angel on it or an image of an angel itself.
There is no doubt in my mind, and in my heart, that all people with this
ailment, as well as all the mentally challenged, are closer to the Creator then
we will ever understand or know. Rachel has also been known to talk to
individuals that others cannot see with the naked human eye and carry on
conversations with them. When asked who they are or were she simply responds
they were someone whom has already passed on or angels. T
his type of scenario is
not uncommon with millions of others whom have had the same experiences with
limited mental capacity due to numerous illnesses. I’m sure you all know of some
story about how ‘grandma or grandpa’ use to ‘talk’ to unseen visitors, and that
the family just thought they were loosing their minds. Well, how do we really
know that they weren’t crazy or hallucinating? Heck, it’s wildly known that even
children talk to invisible ‘playmates’…I myself use to also, and I remember
seeing them just as plain as day. I guess as we grow older most of us loose our
sense of ‘sight’ for this type of relationship with the other side.
This past September and October I worked up at the Koury League ballpark to help
Mrs. Reynolds out. (Her and her family runs the concessions stand and own the
property that the ballpark is on.) On one of those weekends, Rachel came to stay
inside the concession stand and visit with all of us. We had a delightful time
as she sat there with the appetite of a small child, craving sweet things and
eating popcorn. She would occasionally reach out and hold my hand when I was
busy with customers and just sit and smile. When we did have a break to be able
to sit for a moment she always wanted me to sit next to her on one of the large
coolers. It was while sitting and relaxing for a bit on that particular day, she
leaned over and whispered again that there was ‘one thing’ she needed to tell
me, and that it’s been on her mind for a very long time, and it was very
important that she tell me, but she couldn’t recall what it was.
A short time
after this she expressed her need to visit the bathroom and I volunteered to
take her. We had to walk a little ways to use the porta-johns that were placed
away from the concessions but we walked hand in hand in a slow gait enjoying
each other’s company. She began to tell me how the angels have been talking to
her again and they told her that she would have to go home soon. Rachel said she
was ready and was not afraid to leave. When we reached the portable toilets she
made me promise not to leave her while she was inside and to continue talking to
her while the door was shut so she would know I hadn’t left her. Afterwards,
when it was my turn I made her promise the same thing, like we were two small
girls with a trusted and precious friendship. When I got out of the toilet, she
was shining, her face was beaming with joy and she grabbed my shoulders with her
fragile hands of tissue paper skin.
“I remember, I remember!” she cried, and continued, “The one thing I’m suppose
to tell you, the one thing you need to know!” I stood astounded, mouth grinning
and waiting for her response, not wanting to say anything to distract her train
of thought.
She took a deep breath and repeated something that brought me to immediate
tears, and made my heart lurch with an emotion that will be hard to describe in
words. A sensation of spiritual passion, so tender, so pure, so refined and
holy, washed over my entire being leaving me with the perception that an
otherworldly entity had touched my inner core. An entity from and formed by the
Creator, or maybe it was my soul itself, that awoke in that briefest moment and
celebrated the recognition of something it had long forgotten. Possibly a memory
from whence we all come from. All in all, it was a moment in time that defined
my whole life up to that point, and gave purpose to all that I have studied over
the years in terms of religions, creation, and the souls journey. Allow me now
to repeat to you the readers, what this woman said; a phrase that her diseased
mind could not have made up or spoken with such beatitude and precise honesty.
“I loved you before I met you because I knew you in the world that was.”
We stood there for a long time and hugged each other; both of us letting tears
slip down our cheeks, unashamed of our feelings. She also looked up and thanked
God that He allowed her to remember and then looked at me again and said, “We
knew each other before we came here as Rachel and Jan, and we will meet up again
after our job here is over, in the world to come.”
I cried with joy, very silently to myself, as I shook inside from those words.
We walked slowly and quietly back to the concession and it was if all the
hundreds of people around us were in another dimension, as the noises they made
seemed miles away. Rachel and I, for those few minutes were surrounded by an
ethereal nature, like we were having an out of body experience, and could really
feel our own true souls away from the weight of the human body.
Those words gave me a comfortable peace that I have sought for years.
Those words gave me answers to a thousand questions
Those words came from a higher source, or so my own heart believes, and were
spoken by a woman I see now as one of my little angels.
The ‘one thing’, turned out to be the only thing I need to believe in.
-Jan
Thompson.